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Note to self: You do you.


Because real hair is always in. #nyfw
Because real is always in. #nyfw

Now more than ever, it’s so easy to compare our lives with others. Like when your Facebook feed has just shown you a beautiful album of a friend who’s vacationing in Italy, or some celebrity’s just uploaded a stunning #iwokeuplikethis selfie on Instagram. Even though deep down we know most posts are heavily styled and, let’s face it, only about 10% of them are “real” snapshots of “real life”, we can’t help but see how few time, resources, and opportunities we have compared to those of our followings.


But when you look too much into people, places, and things that are outside of yourself, you’re essentially looking into a glass of all your have-nots: The longer you look into it, the more you stop doing you.

It’s like an air-tight container that sucks the sh*t out of your present joy. You lose yourself more easily each time you let it steal your haves, and the day you’re fooled to the point of believing you have absolutely nothing in this world, it can get dangerous.

Wake up, darling. There’s a whole galaxy out there.


A sense of direction

It’s funny. I mean, the “unfollow” button is there, but you just won’t click it. Why? Because they’re hopes and dreams and aspirations you want to keep in mind and that others have turned into their reality. They sum up to everything you’re saving in your bucket before you really kick it.

You gotta admit – while they joy-suck and seem completely unreal at times, they breathe new life to your haves and bring you a load of potential realities at your future disposal.

The irony is this: You may think the looking glass is constantly pressurizing you, but pressurizing also means it pushes you. If you put yourself in a group of followings that do much better at everything that you endeavor yourself to do, then you’re automatically taken two steps ahead to your end-game than if you’re kicking it without the presence of them. Heck, the glass may even connect you to your life’s biggest aspirations sooner than you thought.

So as long as you do do all that matters most to you more than you look into it, the joy-sucking glass will always remain half-full. After all, it’s easier to drive something forward that’s already mobile than something that’s not moving an inch – might as well get biased about you and all that you are.

It’s human to make comparisons everyday. We may try not to, we may pretend not to, but in reality, no two person is equal. We inherently want to belong. We inherently want to feel the same way about things. It’s part of being in the same race, and it’s definitely part of being social.

But as long as we’re here, there will always be subtle similarities, “good” similarities, unique differences, and “better” differences.


A matter of perspective

And that’s the beauty of Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and other popular social media today: Unlike the days when they don’t exist, now you get to choose how you want to define and refine yourself. It’s a wide, open-ended quest for you to exploit, and the only challenge out there is to not forget your reality in the momentary things and in the popular things. Because if you do more comparisons than you do you, you’ll be doing nothing but depressing yourself.

So get up, get out, and remember to be fully, truly, unapologetically you.



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via The Clothes Horse on Tumblr


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